


Hissy Fit

by UnfortunateMoth



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Angst and Porn, Crying, Embarrassment, Enemies to Lovers, Eventual Fluff, Eventual Romance, Feral Anxiety | Virgil Sanders, Gay Panic, Kinda, M/M, Masturbation, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, Possibly OOC, Sexual Fantasy, Sexual Tension, Slow Burn, Sympathetic Deceit | Janus Sanders, Tall Deceit | Janus Sanders, Temporarily Unrequited Love, fellas is it gay to want to kiss and punch your enemy at the same time, fighting but like with sexual tension, fucking long, he just has serious blue balls dont worry, hes a bit of a bitch tho, i cant believe thats a tab thank you, it gets better i promise <3, kind of a pervert but itll lessen in later chapters, leg fetish, theres some emotional stuff despite how im making this seem, these two are a fucking wreck, virgil hates him for it, virgil is a bit horny on main
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-12
Updated: 2021-01-14
Packaged: 2021-03-16 10:48:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 14,040
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28705419
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UnfortunateMoth/pseuds/UnfortunateMoth
Summary: Virgil has been stressed.Returning a lost snake to a certain bastard doesn't really help. Along with seeing a side to said bastard he's never seen before. And now, after fighting with him, he's found in... a predicament. He can't fucking do this.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders & Logic | Logan Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Deceit | Janus Sanders, Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders & Deceit | Janus Sanders, Deceit | Janus Sanders & Logic | Logan Sanders
Comments: 8
Kudos: 36





	1. All Hiss All Bite

Virgil was, to put it bluntly, fucking tired.

He’d been mulling over his work for hours now. He’s always been a bit of a workaholic, and keeping his hands busy like this always calmed him down, but at this hour, his hands were getting cramped holding this small watch as he tinkers with it. A little ironic, the concept of time scared him, but he liked to work on clocks. He didn’t do just clocks, though they were mostly pointless knick knacks with the occasional actually useful shit.

Like the street raccoon he is though, he likes using his hands, working on smaller projects, even if it did make his hands ache. He’s made some computers, fixed up people’s shit for some cash, and then he’d do this. It was much more relaxing. 

College has been rough so far. Everyone here was a fucking weirdo, but he doesn’t really have room to speak. It felt almost cartoonish how everyone here was, though. From the slightly normal to the downright probably insane. He grimaces slightly at remembering how Remus had come to him asking for an explosive. He didn’t give him one, obviously. He never did learn what that explosive he wanted would even be for, and he’s not really sure he wants to know.

Logan was someone he could actually talk to, have somewhat normal conversations. To be honest, Virgil has always had a bit of a thing for him since highschool, and they’ve been friends for a while. It’d be better if he wasn’t spending all of his time with that… snake. He has no idea how the two get along at all. But he was spending less time with Logan cause of that, and it annoyed him to no end.

Sighing, he sets the little watch down, moving the magnifying glass away and stretching his arms out over his head, back popping to tell him how long he’s been hunching over that table. He rubs his calloused hands together, looking at an actual clock that tells him its 2:35 AM. He groans, throwing an arm over his eyes when he hears… something. He blinks, hearing a rustling near his old tool box. Anxiety immediately spikes in his chest. He knows it was probably just a mouse or something, but the movement told him otherwise, as he didn’t hear the telltale skittering of a mouse’s feet.   
He gulps, grabbing a screwdriver as some sort of weapon as he slowly stands, and the noise was quieting slightly. He reaches the old toolbox, not seeing anything around it. He takes in a deep breath and throws open the lid, hearing a buzzing sound. He looks down, seeing a corn snake in there, curling on itself and it’s tail violently shaking despite not having any sort of rattle. He recoils back a bit, and it suddenly dawns on him what this situation means.

Fucking Janus.

Of all fucking horrible things to happen.   
He really doesn’t want to go up to Janus’s room, but he’d also feel bad leaving the snake here. The snake hasn’t done anything wrong, and he has no idea how to even begin taking care of one. He groans, throwing his head back and closing the lid again. He stands there for a moment before picking up the old tool box and leaving the garage he was working in.

He doesn’t really go to the upstairs dorms often, he doesn’t have anyone he likes up of the 4th fucking floor and the elevator isn’t fucking working and god damnit his legs were tired already just looking at the stairs.

He hears the snake rustling around restlessly in the toolbox, probably confused about this situation. That strengthens his resolve a bit. Janus may be an ass but if he’s kind to anything it’s snakes. And Logan, he adds with annoyance. No clue why. 

He walks up the stairs, his anxiety growing with every step. He huffs, finally making it to the 4th floor and walking to the room Janus resides in. It wasn’t too hard to find his room, as his door was the only one with any sort of character, some old stickers stuck onto the wood and a cheesy “beware of snakes” sign. It would be cute if it were anyone else. He rolls his eyes and stands at the door, trying to work up the nerve to knock. He’s not sure how long he stands there like a fool, it could’ve been minutes or seconds, but he finally knocks loudly on the door. Maybe a bit too forceful.

On the other side, he can hear a groan and shuffling.

“Just a second, please.” He hears the tired voice say. It was weird hearing him speak without his usual theatrics and dramatic flair, it was like talking to Roman but so much more annoying. It was strange hearing him talk like a normal person.

Soon enough, the door opens a crack, a silver eye peeking out.

“Oh, it’s just you.” He says, and although his voice was tired, he could hear some venom in it as the door opens more, showing Janus. “Why do you bother me when it’s close to the witching hour?”

Again, it was strange seeing him not in his usual gothic villain attire. Well, they’re both emo nightmares but Janus loves going all out, so it was strange seeing him quite literally stripped down to a normal looking human being. All he has on was an old t-shirt and some black boxers. It was offputting to see the snake so casual. He gulps, meeting his eyes, noting that his stupid yellow contact wasn’t in. That should’ve been obvious, he was probably just sleeping, but it felt like a different person in front of him. He was still annoyingly tall though, the bastard.

“Are you going to say something, or just stand here looking like a fool?” He asks, and Virgil growls a little.

“Yeah, yeah.” He doesn’t really know why he pushes himself into the room, he really has no need to, but he’s here now. Janus watches with a tired expression looking at the tool box that’s shoved at him. Opening it, he sees the other’s eyes widen as he quickly takes the snake out. Its tongue flicks out, seeming to recognize the smell of its owner.

“You… You didn’t kidnap her, did you?” He asks, an accusatory gaze kept on Virgil.   
“No, if I did why the fuck would I be returning her?” He asks, and Janus doesn’t answer, looking over his snake carefully for any injuries. Seeing none, he sighs in relief, a small smile on his face as the creature works its way up his arm. It seemed like Virgil was completely forgotten in that moment, Janus’s full attention on the snake as it tries to climb onto his head. He laughs, not his usual annoying and villainous laugh, but genuine. He then pulls her down back to his hands, going over to a rack system that he has just noticed. He runs his hands over the handles, eyebrows furrowed as he tries to remember which one is hers in his tired state. Virgil sits down on the edge of the mattress, looking around.

The room was mostly neat, some things disorganized and a stack of homework on his desk. However, musical posters lined the walls, other subtle things that showed a bit about Janus, like the stuffed frog on his bed, the fairy lights hung around, a roll of bandages near the snake rack. He would’ve asked why the school let him keep these snakes, before closing his mouth remembering Biology and Herpetology were the things he was fucking studying.

“Thank you for returning her safely.” He says suddenly and Virgil looks over at him.

“Yeah, yeah whatever.” He huffs. “Why were you sleeping though, I thought that snakes were nocturnal?” He gives that small jab, and Janus visually takes a moment to process that before sighing and pinching his nose. It was always fun getting back at him.

“No, not all snakes.” He crosses his arms. “Im more of a… ‘sleeping whenever the fuck my body fails me’. Don’t think theres a word for that one though.”

He looked much more rigid now, annoyed after putting his snake up and having Virgil in his room for some fucking reason. Virgil himself wasn’t really sure what compelled him to barge in. He mutters to himself, something about upgrading their security. He notices how tightly we was holding onto his bicep, hard enough to create creases in the already scarred skin.

“What.. state was she in when you found her? Was she acting weirdly at all?” He asks, worrying his bottom lip, which gave Virgil a weird feeling for some reason. He resorts to just completely looking away and shrugging. 

“I dunno. I just heard a rattling, got nervous and like, grabbed my screwdriver in case I needed to, uh, fight something off-” He gets cut off by Janus’s laughter, the noise annoying him.

“You were holding it like a knife?” He asks, gesturing to how Virgil was holding his hand up- he hadn’t really realized, but yeah that was indeed how he approached. His face flushes with embarrassment and Janus laughs more, shoulders shaking.

“Oh, shut the fuck up, it’s not like you know any more than I do.” He growls. “I can fight too, I was just caught off guard!”

“Can you now?” He raises an eyebrow, gesturing to Virgil as if that answered anything. “You’re about as threatening as a kitten.”   
Okay, now he knows he’s just trying to push buttons. Virgil stands, looking up at Janus. The height difference was pretty obvious, but Janus just had freakishly long legs. It didn’t really intimidate him, especially since Janus wasn’t in his normal dark persona and acting like an over the top villain. 

“You’re really emotional, Virge. I’d suggest if you want to live up to your intimidating appearance, you should, well… Start being intimidating.” He smirks, that stupid smirk he gives when he knows he’s bothering someone. Fucking brat.

“Fuck you.” He clenches his fist and Janus tilts his head a bit.

“All hiss, but no bite.” He teases, and Virgil almost rolled his eyes. How can Janus pretend to be intimidating when he makes stupid jokes like that. But, that was the least of his worries right now, an anger bubbling and his fists clenched at his sides. 

“All bark, no bite, huh?!” He growls. “You fucking-”

And before he can even finish, he tackles down the taller man who lets out a yelp, having obviously not expected he’d actually take action.

He almost immediately regains his footing, and jumps down onto Janus’s back, effectively pinning him to the floor with a triumphant smirk. Well, at least he thought it was effective. The other manages to twist his torso around, teeth bared and eyes dilated with surprise. Despite having just woken up minutes ago, he seemed to be pretty energized right now. He could see the small eyebags, and the freckles he wouldn’t normally be able to see since the snake usually wore makeup. It was a side of him that he’d never seen before, and he could’ve been pretty cute if it weren’t Janus.

That thought threw him off guard, and seeing the opening, the other growls and forcefully pushes his head back in a way that really hurt his already sore neck. He escapes from underneath him, and tackles him this time.

Virgil winces, completely riled up now as he tries to gain the right footing. This wasn’t fighting so much as it was wrestling. He’d been angry at the snake’s taunts, but he didn’t plan on actually hurting the fucker. But his morals were thrown out of the window and replaced instead with adrenaline. He moves to pin the fucker to the wall, only Janus had somehow found an opening, punching his gut and he hits the back of the nightstand, pain blooming in his back and stomach.

“Fuck!” He curses, glaring at Janus. “That fucking hurt!”

“That was kinda the point. If you’re gonna fight me, then actually fight me. Unless you’ve got cold feet?” He gives a taunting smirk, and he knows that he's purposefully egging him on, but he doesn't care right now.

They’re both standing again, and Virgil growls, replying with a messy punch to the chest. Janus winces, but dodges the second one, only to be pushed back up against the wall, gripping the front of his shirt.

“You’re getting a bit emotional, it’s making you sloppy.” He continues that stupid fucking taunting. 

“I’m emotional because you piss me off, snake.” He growls, trying to shove him back onto the ground but he manages to keep his footing before he could fall. This was getting fucking annoying. He throws another punch. They were both tired, and he was sure that he was somehow losing this fight to the fucking stick of a man in front of him, and that just pissed him off more. He wrestles the tallers arms as they push and pull at eachother. He just wanted a quick revenge for that gut punch. Without thinking much over this at all, he bites down onto the exposed area between Janus’s neck and shoulder, hard, like the feral bitch he is.

“Ah-!”

The snake lets out a foreign noise he doesn’t think he’s ever heard before. Something about it made his blood rush, but he couldn’t really think about that for long before he was shoved off, warm flesh disconnected harshly as he fell back. 

He hit his head against the wall, wincing in pain as his head spins and his muscles ache. He closes his eyes, trying to make the dizziness stop and he licks his lips, tasting a metallic flavor. It takes him a moment to process it before his eyes snap open, staring at where he had bitten Janus. It wasn’t too bad, but there were obvious marks and his canines managed to break the skin. Huh, he didn’t know they were that sharp.

“Alright, that’s it-” He was obviously tired too, voice shaking, and although they were both exhausted, he still jumped onto him, making him groan. He realizes he’s not being punched or hit, and his eyes open, Janus trying to cage him in like some sort of animal. His thighs were tight against his hips, holding him in place. And the hands that had been so gently holding that snake just minutes earlier were gripped tightly onto his shoulders, keeping him pinned to the wall. He could so easily push him off, but he’s too tired to. He tells himself that at least.

“Give up, just admit your loss.” Janus says, though he didn’t really look much better, breathing heavy. He’s not sure if it’s from the fighting, or the hard bite he was given. Maybe both. Virgil growls, squirming a little.

“Shut up, fuck you.” He says this, but sighs, loosening a bit, neither of them moving. Janus probably wouldn’t get off until he admitted his defeat, but he wasn’t gonna give him the satisfaction of that. So instead, he takes the moment to just look at the other. 

He was still panting, silver eyes staring at him, shoulders and body wound so tense he was shaking. His skin was flushed, but he was sure he didn’t look any better. His shirt hung loosely, showing off the bite mark that was now turning a shade of purple and green. He furrows his eyebrows. He was starting to regret it now, and wanted to look away but the guilt had already formed. It looked painful. Sure he had pissed him off, but he wanted both of them to come out of this unscathed.

He averts his gaze, his eyes landing on his legs. They were smooth… He hadn’t noticed while they were fighting. Does he shave often? Very pale and he can feel the warmth of them with how close they’re stuck together. Long, slender, soft legs, accentuated by his height. Contrary to his arm and face, they were unmarked, no scars to be seen. Though now that hes staring and thinking about this, he’s never really seen those scars as ugly. But he’d also never thought of them as attractive until now. He’s not sure what’s gotten into him.

His hands were still pressed against his shoulders, though not as tightly as before. He could easily push him off. He’s surprised that Janus hasn’t gotten up yet, he guesses he’s waiting for him to admit defeat. The stubborn bastard. He glances to the hands. They looked nice, too. Surprisingly delicate, even if one was scarred. He does suppose he doesn’t do the kind of work Virgil does. He has rougher hands for his tinkering, and Janus has his smooth, long fingers to hold his snakes so gently. He wets his lips, trying to look anywhere but Janus, but he realizes how close they are. It’s hard to not look at him when they’re pressed together like this.

Really close. Janus was in fact straddling his hips, and has been for a while now. Why is the closeness just now making him feel weird? He takes in his appearance again. Flushed skin from all of that exertion, his breathing has slowed down more, but he still looked tired, messed up hair, silver eyes staring hard at him, a hint of annoyance at him. It made him smirk a little. Loose shirt, exposed pale neck, the bite mark had stopped bleeding a while ago, but he could still taste it in his mouth. Just in his shirt and boxers. Maybe it was the heat of the fighting, his hormones getting mixed in there and confusing the pot. Because of any other occasion, he would never think of the snake this way. He had a desire to see him squirm.

He bites his cheek. He has no idea what Janus is thinking. But judging by his tired and annoyed face, he probably just wants him to give up and say he lost so he can go back to sleep. He looked good like this. Though it also made him want to see more. He didn’t really show this much skin, and he realizes the thought is so stupid but it’s true. He doesn’t like to show his pretty skin off. Though, he’s also alright with being one of the only ones to see him like this. He’s sure others have, too, but it was a strange feeling. He wonders if he’s slept with anyone before.

That thought makes him want to smack himself. He really doesn’t know where this sudden horniness came from, but it has to stop.

“You know, I’m getting a little tired waiting to hear you say it.” Janus drawls, sighing heavily. Dramatic bastard. He wanted to punch him and kiss him at the same time. He hums, and in his foggy mind he doesn’t really think when he grabs the man’s thighs. Not hard at all, really. He sees how his eyes dart down, and then back to him, confused. He probably thinks this is some sort of weird tactic to get him off. His skin was indeed soft, and he grips a little harder. Janus huffs, muttering something under his breath. He adjusts his thighs, clenching them a bit uncomfortably. He tilts his head a bit, staring at Virgil with confusion, wondering just what exactly is he trying to accomplish. It was kinda cute.

His brain must not be working right now. It feels like a broken engine and he’s desperately trying to turn his common sense back on to no avail. His mouth felt all too dry, and he realizes hes hard. He swallows, dragging his nails down to Janus’s knees, not hard at all or even enough to hurt, but he still enjoyed the subtle way his legs flinched. He sighs, trying to get his mind out of the gutter. This was too much. He keeps his hands on his knees, trying to not squeeze too hard out of stress. It was much less inappropriate, but he still felt a warmth in his gut. 

He was fucked.

A very embarrassing and risky situation indeed. There’s no way he could conceal his boner, not with him still on top of him. He can be glad it’s not pressing into Janus, but if he moved it very well could. He gulps a bit, looking up at Janus and sighing, going limp again. He was almost reluctant to take his hands off, but god that made him sound like a fucking creepy pervert.

“Okay, okay, fucking fine. Get the hell off of me, you win, alright?” He huffs, not exactly happy about this. Janus’s gaze looked a bit confused before he gave an annoying smirk.

“It appears I’ve come out on top again.” He taunts, not moving to get off of him just yet, probably to add insult to injury. In fact, he leans in more, showing his stupid smug face inches from his own and god fucking damnit. 

He groans, shifting a bit, attempting to scooch his legs up a bit to hoist the man off of him. He was really nervous now, the reality of the situation just now starting to sink in. 

“Yeah, yeah. C’mon, get off of me.”

“How do I know you won’t attack me again? You ambushed me twice, and drew some blood, y’know.” He states this dramatically, but his eyes do hold suspicion as he stares at Virgil.

“I’m serious, I’m not mad anymore! Im sorry for this shit but just get off.” He groans.

“I guess I can’t keep you here forever..” He glances at his bed, and he remembers how he’d been woken up from a peaceful sleep. “A little surprised, though. You put up a good fight. But I guess I can let you go. I’m pretty fucking exhausted.”

He laughs a little, Virgil just glaring. “Oh, you’re no fun right now. No growling or snappy comebacks? Booo.”

Virgil was about ready to tell him off again, when he loosens his leg grip and he shifted backwards to free him. 

Really bad move.

His hips twitch up involuntarily, and it should not have felt that good pressed up under the weight of the other’s body, he makes a soft noise at the feeling. Janus blinks, slowly realizing what exactly was happening. He swears he sees him go through the five stages of grief before he eventually just looks shocked, face flushing a bit as he gets up quickly. 

God this was embarrassing. He just hopes that Janus won’t be too cruel and hold this over his head. He groans, hiding his face in his hands. They’re both really quiet.

“I-” Janus tries to break the ice but Virgil interrupts him. 

“Shut up, I don’t wanna hear it, snake. Just cause it happened doesn’t mean it means shit!” He groans, curling in on himself. Janus winces a bit at the yelling.

“You don’t have to be ashamed or anything.” He says, his voice a bit nervous himself. “This kinda thing happens alot. It’s kinda natural. I learned in Biology… Uh, when male animals fight they usually become erect to assert their dominance.” 

He sounds incredibly awkward, wincing at his own words. It was supposed to be a way to comfort him, but it just sounded weird.

“You saying I’m an animal or something?” 

“It’s just something animals do, I thought your reaction sorta…” He trails off, grimacing. “Yeah.” He clears his throat, looking away. Virgil groans.

“Whatever. Fuck. No, nope, I’m leaving. I do not want to deal with this right now. Sorry for starting a fight or whatever.. Just, fuck- okay. Bye.”

He doesn’t give Janus much of a chance to respond as he rushes out the door, already making his way to the stairs. 

He cannot have a gay panic right now. Nope. Nope. Especially not with the guy he fucking hates. Thoughts were swirling in his head, as he walks uncomfortably. He has no idea what’s going on in the snake’s head right now. He hopes that Janus believes the words he himself spoke and it wasn’t just him being a fucking creepy bastard. He groans again, rubbing his hands down his face. It was a weird feeling, though, the intrusion of Janus in his thoughts and taking up the forefront. He bites his lip hard. He could admit Janus was attractive, but why did he have to get so worked up? The closeness? His legs? God, his legs. Heat was still pooled in his gut. He always had a bit of a thing for legs, but he never really got that enamoured with someone’s fucking thighs. And it wasn’t just anyone, it was fucking Janus of all people. He wants to scream. He runs a hand through his hair, unlocking his dorm room and locking it behind him.

He felt so guilty for thinking these things. Even if it wasn’t Janus and it was someone else, he always felt guilty when he thought of people in such a perverse way. He really couldn’t get him out of his head, though, and he curses, biting his lip as his mind starts to wander, thinking about his soft skin and silver eyes. 

He huffs in frustration, throwing himself back onto his bed. He was still hard. He wonders what would’ve happened if Janus reciprocated his arousal. He shivers a bit at the thought. He feels gross, but now he’s starting to indulge into his thoughts. He was still nervous, all sorts of anxieties creeping on him, but its just one night. And then he’ll never have to think about this bastard again.

His eyes were so expressive, and honestly beautiful. It’s a shame he wears that stupid yellow contact. Just a beautiful color. What would they look like when he’s worked up? Pupils blown and eyes lidded. Skin flushed. 

It felt too hot in here. He throws off his hoodie, getting rid of some of that heat, but he obviously just needs to get off. He’s been trying to avoid it, it’s embarrassing enough to think of someone you know like that, and getting off to them too. 

God he’s been too stressed lately. He lays back, palming at the tent in his pants and letting out a sigh. His train of thought continues.

What would he act like? He wonders if he’d still be a sarcastic bastard. He’d love to shut him up, reduce him to nothing but whines. Put him in his place. Right beneath him. See what else he can do with that lying tongue of his.

He groans, finally whipping it out, sighing at the feeling and stroking slowly. He gulps, closing his eyes again.

He wants to touch him. Explore his body. See him writhe under him. Helpless. Pinning those pretty hands over his head. Maybe a bit of revenge for earlier. See what he feels like being pinned and powerless. He just wants the confident villainous persona to completely crumble because of him. He remembers the noise Janus had made when he bit him. He wasn’t sure if it was pain, pleasure, or both, but he definitely has never heard anything like that come from him before. He still felt a bit guilty but right now he was too caught up in his fantasies.

He didn’t realize how much of a sadist he is until now. He wouldn’t want to do anything too painful or without explicit consent. But maybe he likes the way his skin bruises a little too much. He’d like to cover those pretty thighs in them. He’d like to mark up that pale skin in general. Would Janus make alot of noise? Would he be more silent? He likes the idea of Janus moaning his name. Maybe bent over a desk or pinned up against a wall. He pushed him against the wall during that fight, though that action wasn’t sexually motivated. He’d also like to see his face, though. Wipe that stupid smirk clean off. See what it looks like when hes on the edge.

He wonders again if he’s ever been touched before. He’s pretty handsome, but he can also be intimidating with his outward appearance. But he plays into the idea that maybe he’s still a virgin. He wonders if he’d be nervous at all. 

He groans, bucking his hips and shuddering. He hasn’t gotten off in a while. He thinks back to Janus in his dorm right now. He wonders if he’s asleep by now. He groans, a bit of embarrassment biting at him, but he thinks back to what would happen if Janus reciprocated.

Judging by his reaction to Virgil, he wonders if he would’ve gotten just as embarrassed, if not more. He could imagine the taller red faced and breathless, slowly grinding down on him, whimpering. He groans, throwing his other arm over his eyes. God he’s thinking things all out of order, but its all working for him. Just jumbled up thoughts and they’re all about fucking Janus. He groans, longing to feel soft skin, or a warm mouth. Feel those delicate fingers on him. They were very opposite in that regard. He was rough and his hands were calloused and cracked from his work, whereas Janus is just.. Soft. The only part that’s not are his scars. He wonders what they’d feel like under his hands, or how far they reach. Fuck, why were those attractive too? Fucking stupid, handsome, piece of shit Janus. He’d like to growl those words into his ear, let him know just how much he’s plagued his mind, all while fucking him like a dog in heat, emphasizing his words with each thrust.  
He lets out a low groan in the back of his throat. 

He slows down as he feels himself approaching his orgasm, letting out a breath as he slowly rides it out, cum now on his stomach and chest. He’ll definitely have to shower and clean his sheets. He still thought of Janus, only less violently since he’s relieved himself. He hopes he never has to think about this again, but he has the sneaking suspicion that it wont. God, and he’ll be seeing him in classes almost every day. Fuck. He drags his hands down his face, sighing. He stays there for a moment before standing to clean up.

Glancing at the time, he realizes its 4:08 AM, and class starts in 4 hours. God. He can’t fucking do this.


	2. A Hint of Venom

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OK SO THIS CHAPTER DOESNT HAVE ANY SEXY STUFF JUST JANUS BEING EMO SORRY FELLAS

God. He can’t fucking do this.

Contrary to popular belief, Janus isn’t oblivious. Some things may fly over his head, yes, but he’s not as dumb as people like to think. So it took him awhile to process what happened with Virgil, yeah, but he wasn’t oblivious to what had happened. In his tired, stupid state his first thought was his fucking biology class. But then he woke up and it dawned on him. He had alot of conflicting emotions. The idea of Virgil himself was making him shake and not in a fun sexy kind of way. He used to long for Virgil to look at him the way he did, appreciate him, touch him gently, and… He got that, but years later. And now old feelings are resurfacing and he can’t stop pacing. He tried to hold one of his snakes, but it ended up stressing the snake out too.

He shudders a sigh, running a hand through his hair for probably the millionth time. He just can’t get it off his mind. Stupid fucking Virgil. He can’t even remember why they had fought, but Virgil’s temper blew. He was sore when he woke up, an ache in his neck and chest. His temple was also slightly bruised. He groans, pacing some more, when something catches his eye. He pauses. 

He left his fucking toolbox.

Of fucking course he did.  
He pinches the bridge of his nose, taking a deep breath to try and calm himself down. He hopes that this was just a one time thing. That his biology lesson was right and that Virgil was just being a dumbass and backs off. Stupid fucking tired idiot him was too stupid and tired to really think that situation out. But the worst part was that he liked the attention. He liked it alot. It was what he wanted all those years ago and he didn’t realize how much he still wanted it until last night. He breathes heavily, fixing his hair a bit and leaving his dorm. He still had time before classes started, so he decided to head to Remus’s dorm. He was the only person who knew about his pathetic woes. He takes a small moment to compose himself before knocking on the door.

“Come iiiin~!” A singsong voice calls out and he sighs, albeit with some fondness.

“Are you by chance naked?” He asks, raising an eyebrow at the door. There’s laughter behind the door and it opens for him, and Janus finds himself amused as well, coming in. 

Remus’s dorm was always messy, but he was surprised to see it was less so. He doesn’t comment on it though, his brief amusement dropping back into distress.  
“Why, my dark prince, speak to me your woes!” Remus picks up on the mood, and tries to lighten it a bit. Janus gives a weak smile.

“I’m afraid… I may have fallen again.” He speaks slowly, and Remus drops his theatrics, sitting down on the couch.  
“Is it what I think it is?” He asks, patting the space beside him and he takes it, leaning back.   
“I dunno. If you’re thinking purple hair, eyebags, and chipped nails you might be on the right track.” He laughs, though there isn’t much humor behind it. They’re both quiet for a bit.   
“Do you wanna talk about it? Or do you need somethin’ else, adder?” He asks, looking over.   
“I don’t know. I’m just stressed. We… fought last night. Like, a physical fight. Not the usual bullshit. I don’t know- stuff happened and I’m still really confused. To make it worse he left his fucking toolbox, so I have to see him again.” He groans, sinking deeper into the couch. “I don’t know Rem, I might go out tonight. Relieve stress.”

Remus stares at him for a bit, humming. “That bad, huh? Are you sure you wanna do that, though? Last time you did that you came back worse than before. Instead of like, hooking up with someone you could just fucking relax for once. Get that stick out of your ass and actually, y’know, not fuck up your mental state.”  
As much as he’d hate to admit it, Remus was right. People always thought Remus was stupid, too. He isn’t, even if he doesn’t take his own advice. In fact, he’s Janus’s only confidant. That’s a lot of trust for someone like himself. He knows that going out to a bar and hooking up won’t make him feel better, but at least it makes him feel something, even if it’s not a good feeling. He sighs, running a hand through his hair.   
“I’ll think about it, kelpie.” He says slowly, looking up at the ceiling.   
“Kelpie! That’s a new one!” Remus cheers. Janus smiles.   
“Yeah, I thought you’d like it. You are the true embodiment of a cursed water horse that drowns people.” He says in a charming way.   
“Ohh, you’ll make me swoon, King Cobra!” Saying that, he swoons dramatically, splaying out over the couch. Janus laughs, shaking his head and pushing Remus away from him.   
“Hey, while you’re here, you should tell me some fun little facts.” Remus says, staring at him with wide eyes. He knew that Remus just wanted him to not stress, talk about things he likes. He smiles a bit.   
“Well, did you know that king cobras aren’t actually cobras? Despite the name, they’re not in the same genus as the other cobras, Naja. It’s actually more closely related to mambas, but it has its own genus, Ophiophagus.” He explains, smiling as he speaks about this.   
“Wait, wait- so they’re not cobras? Why the fuck do they have that name then?” Remus asks, confused. Janus simply shrugs, smirking.   
“Herpetology has been so strange. They’re such interesting animals. Obviously I favor snakes, though.” He laughs, mood lightening. 

They sit there, chatting for a while, and the tenseness in Janus has lessened, but it was starting to rise once again when he notices the time. He’s not ready to face today. He sighs, and that sigh turns into a groan as he sinks down.  
“I should… get ready for today. I still have some time to dress and do my makeup. Can I… Can I come back here after classes today?” He asks, but already knows the answer.   
“Pfff- obviously! I’m always willing to have a hot guy in my dorm.” He gives an exaggerated wink which Janus rolls his eyes at, but a smile was clear on his face.   
“Oh, you make me swoon, Toad Prince.” He puts a hand to his forehead, batting his eyelashes.   
“Yeah, yeah, get the fuck outta here, adder.” They both laugh as Janus leaves.

Leaving was the harder part. It was like his energy was sapped the moment he left his friend’s dorm. He rubs his eyes, whispering a curse to himself as he goes down a floor back to his room. He stares at that old toolbox, the cursed thing. He sighs heavily, shaking his head and going to the bathroom to do his usual routine. He was on the clock, though, so it couldn’t be quite what he wanted, but at least he looked presentable. He slips in his contact. He knows people think its weird, that he’s over the top. That’s kinda the fucking point. He’s doing it for himself, mostly. He just likes the way it looks. He combs his hair, letting it fall into his face for today, he didn’t have much time to style it.  
He gets dressed. Not quite as elaborate today. A turtleneck to better hide that damned bite. He was lucky Remus didn’t see it. He’s not sure what Remus would say or do, he was unpredictable like that. He slips on a long sweater and ties his boots. Did he need the heels? No. He just liked having a few more inches of power. He was already tall, but he just adds it to be more confident, more than anything. At least he’s hot as hell. Despite his ugly scars. That kinda ruined the aesthetic, but whatever.   
  


He sighs, grabbing his bag and stuffing that stupid fucking toolbox inside, having enough room. He adjusts his gloves, and walks out of his room with a faux confidence that looked real to anybody else passing by. He was used to stares, whispers, and comments by now. If he wasn’t confident though, that meant he was vulnerable. He sighs, the walk wasn’t far, but it was always lonely. Logan and him didn’t have the same morning classes, but at least after this first class he’d be a bit less lonely.  
He walks into the class, already anticipating to see Virgil sulking. He has a quiet sigh. Maybe he should continue playing dumb about last night. That’ll probably make things worse, but he really doesn’t want to confront that conversation or his own feelings. Call him a coward. Instead, he walks up to him with a smile, noticing how he was much more brooding today. It might not have been clear to anyone else, though.

“Well aren’t you just a ray of sunshine?” He says in a taunting voice, giving a smirk. He can already sense the annoyance, but he notices the red in his cheeks, albeit faint. “Don’t go feral on me, I really don’t plan on talking to you, especially after you attacked me last night.” Although Virgil got most of the beating, he was still the one who made the first move.  
He opens his bag, feeling the way the other’s eyes were on him. It was much more uncomfortable after last night, but he doesn’t let it show. He glances over, seeing exactly where he was staring. He tries not to show… whatever he’s feeling. He’s not sure what it is. It’s not really uncomfortable, but more… nervous? He isn’t quite sure. He clears his throat, and Virgil looks up at him.

“I have legs, fucking astonishing, right? Anyways, you left your toolbox at my dorm, you must’ve forgotten it on your way out.” He says, and couldn’t help but throw that little bit of teasing at the end there. He doesn’t miss the way he blushes, nor does he miss the way his eyes are glued to him. It was a strange sensation. A part of him loved this attention. He loved the way he looked at him, the way he’d blush. He wanted this for a long time, but the other part of him is screaming to run away. He doesn’t want to get hurt, not again.  
“Anyways, toodles.” He smiles, giving a little wave as he walks to his seat. He can feel the eyes on him the whole time.

It was, again, a strange sensation. He wasn’t sure if it was uncomfortable or not. He doesn’t even know if Virgil’s staring is subconscious or not. Either way, he felt like he was under a microscope right now. He’s usually used to stares, but Virgil never stares this much. Maybe he’s overthinking things? Janus isn’t the only one who has to think over stuff, he’s sure Virgil does too, but he wishes that didn’t include watching him like a hawk. His eyebrow twitches in annoyance, and even though he’s trying, it’s hard to focus on the lecture like this.

He snaps his pencil.

A few heads turn, but it wasn’t loud enough to completely distract everyone. Though the ones close by looked a bit unnerved as he silently pushes the broken pencil away and pulls out a new one. He was just… There were alot of feelings currently happening. Right now, annoyance took the front seat. The two were always annoyed with eachother, but this was different, and he didn’t really know how to describe it. His leg bounces, a bit uncomfortable because the desk isn’t really meant for people who’re over 6’2. But he still did it, a few annoyed glances at him, but again, he didn’t care. He was listening to the lecture, vaguely. He would usually be absorbed in their lectures, and try to take all his notes, but it was harder today. So much harder, especially with the eyes on his back the whole time.  
It felt like days before the lecture was over. And he gives a relieved sigh, stretching his arms out over his head and standing up, bumping his legs a little with a small groan. He glances back, and Virgil looks away. Of course. He stacks his notes neatly, puts them up, and then swings his bag over his shoulder, walking out the door. He had planned to go to his usual spot where he meets Logan. Logan was always refreshing to talk to, so he was looking forward to it. He fished his phone out to send a text to Logan. He’d always get worried if he didn’t say anything before they met up. It was kind of sweet, he was always picky about the time and making sure they don’t miss eachother. As he’s about to unlock his phone, though, he feels a familiar grip on his arm and he nearly drops his phone. He wasn’t shaken, nor was he pushed or moved, his fingers were just shaking subtly. He hoped it wasn’t noticed as he turns his phone off and gives a smile to Virgil.

“Are you in need of something?” He asks, annoyance in his voice. Virgil seemed so confident at first, but now confronting him seemed to have him on edge. He raises an eyebrow as he waits for him to say something. His grip was still tight. He works on tiny little watches, but he loves being forceful. He wonders if it might leave a mark. He hears Virgil take a breath and focuses on him again.  
“Tomorrow. Can we meet up? After school?” He asks. It was a simple question, very innocent on the surface, but he had a feeling it wasn’t so innocent. His legs felt a little weak. He kept his expression, though.   
“Sure thing, blackbird.” He says, a bit of bite to his tone that wasn’t really intended. He could see the annoyance on the other’s face, and he bites his lip. He doesn’t have high expectations. At best this could be some sorta hate fuck. At worst he could be beaten to a bloody pulp. Neither sounded super desirable. He used to want to drop everything for this man. A part of him still does. A part of him wants to be here with him and indulge him. He just wishes it didn’t hurt as bad as it did. He really needs to let go of his past feelings. He’s sure Virgil doesn’t even realize. He sighs a bit, the shorter still staring at him. He chances a question.   
“What should I expect meeting up with you tomorrow?” He asks, almost in a sour tone. Virgil looks a bit surprised, thinking it over.   
“I uh, just wanna talk about last night.” He stumbles over his words a bit. He nods slowly.  
“Okay. Fine then, where would you like to meet?” He asks. He could feel his own heart beating fast as he crossed his arms over his chest. He wasn’t sure what to expect. He had a few ideas of where this would go. Virgil wets his lips, looking down. He seemed nervous himself.   
“M… My dorm..?” He answers, almost sounding like a question. There it was. They both knew the implications. He had a feeling it was coming, but actually hearing it sends a bit of a chill. He swallows, thinking to himself. He knows that in the end it’ll hurt alot. Like, alot. Cause Virgil is just confused and needs an outlet, probably. And Janus on the other hand is indulging in his own stupid dumb mushy feelings. Even after everything, he still… loved the man in front of him. He bites his lip. He gives a bit of a shaky sigh, something he’s positive Virgil noticed.  
“Alright. I’ll meet you after school tomorrow, then.” He gives a smile. “Don’t worry, I don’t bite. Not sure if I can say the same for you.”

He gestures to his covered neck, watching with enjoyment at how he flushes and clenches his fists. He opens his mouth to speak but Janus beats him to it. “Anyways, I have to meet up with Logan. He’s probably worried since I haven’t texted him.” He gives a smile and starts walking away before the other could say anything.

And instead of going to their meetup spot, he goes into the nearest bathroom and drops on the ground. He feels like a stupid teenager again. Only, when he was a teenager it was simpler and he had slightly less stress. He never worried about this shit as a teen, though. Stupid, mushy fucking feelings. He wanted to slam his head into the wall. Instead, he grabs his phone, seeing some unread texts from Logan.

* * *

`Logan: Hello. Classes have ended. I’ve waited a few minutes, and I do not wish to appear “clingy” texting you like this.

Logan: I am simply worried.

Logan: I saw that you were typing and then suddenly stopped, earlier. 

Logan: Is everything alright?`

* * *

Janus sighs, resting his head against his arm. He takes a moment before slowly typing. 

* * *

`Me: Sorry for keeping you waiting, I think I’m just a bit sick, is all.

Logan: I see. Do you wish for assistance?

Me: no, its okay im just going back to my room I think.

Logan: I suppose that is fine. I will inform the professor for you, though I cannot guarantee they will be kind about this.

Me: yeah yah i know. m just gonna take it easy

Logan: I can come by later if you’d like?

Me: no no its fine go focus on your work, i have some catching up i need to do anyways`

* * *

He turns off his phone before he can see any reply. It can be hard to talk to Logan sometimes, especially since he’s so perceptive. He probably knows something is wrong. And he’d be right. Janus doesn’t want to talk about it much yet, though. Maybe Remus. He sighs heavily, standing slowly and walking back to the dorms. If anyone raises eyebrows at him, he simply ignores, sighing as he walks up the stairs, going a floor higher than his actual dorm and to Remus’s dorm. Remus was most likely in classes, or doing god knows what, but he doesn’t really want to be in his own room right now. He unlocks the door with his spare key, stepping inside and groaning loudly.

He goes straight for the fridge, prying it open and taking some beers out. He didn’t really like alcohol, all of it tastes like shit to him, but he just needs a buzz right now. He flops back onto the couch, shrugging off his sweater. The room was messy, but it didn’t smell as bad as it used to. Remus has been getting better with that. But he was still having alot of issues lately. Everyone likes to undermine his issues. He talked about needing to change medicine and how he should be away from him during the transitional period. It would suck to not be around him for a few days, but he wants his friend to feel better. They both had huge plates of issues and trauma.

He sighs. Finding his friend drunk on his couch might not help his issues, but it helps Janus. It doesn’t, actually, but he’s gonna pretend like it does. He sighs, taking a long sip and staring up at the ceiling. He really had alot to think about. He knows that, when tomorrow comes, and if they do what he expects them to… He know that in the moment it’ll be great, but afterwards, it’ll be really shitty cause it’s a one time things and feelings are fucking stupid like that. He wishes he could turn those feelings off and be able to do dumb shit without emotional consequences.

He wants to have sex with Virgil. He wants to touch him and be touched. He wants that intimacy. What he doesn’t want is the aftermath. He’ll be brought back to reality after that high, and things will be… God he doesn’t know how things will be. He wants more, though, as selfish as it is.

It seems his feelings die hard. He should be happy he even fucking gets this chance. And he is. Kinda. God, it’s so fucking confusing.

He remembers the feeling of those rough hands on his legs. His nails. He knows now that was intentional. At the time, he was tired and confused. Well he’s tired and confused still, but a different type of tired and confused. He just… wants to hold or be held.   
But he always admired Virgil’s hard work, even after they stopped being friends. He’s talented. He’s always been talented with his hands. He’s grown a bit rough over the years, but he didn’t mind the feeling. Virgil was strong. He was just hotheaded and irrational. He’s lucky he didn’t break anything, to be honest. But its another thing he admires. He’s just so hard working. And Janus… Well, he does some difficult stuff, yes, but it feels small compared to Virgil. He himself has to be at least a bit strong when handling larger species, but he doesn’t handle them often. Plus, the campus will only let him keep smaller animals. They were wary even allowing him that. He really… doesn’t do much. He loves what he’s doing, yeah, but he feels almost lazy. Like he doesn’t work hard enough.

He groans, downing the can and throwing it aside. He huffs, throwing an arm over his eyes. Why does his self esteem have to be so low? He always holds himself with confidence. He wishes that confidence actually helped him.

He knows in reality that Virgil is most definitely not perfect, he knows that for a fact and first hand experience, but… Wow, he really is stooping so low to fuck Janus, huh? In reality, he knows its probably just using him as an outlet to vent his frustrations, and it probably has nothing to do with appearance, but god. He has many mixed emotions. He’s already made up his mind, though. He’ll enjoy his time with Virgil, and then immediately go back to this wallowing later. That’s how it usually is. But hey, at least he’s excited for half of the experience.

He groans, opening another can.

He’s not really sure how much time has passed. Mostly cause he wasn’t paying attention. But it must’ve been a lot of time cause he hears the dorm room's door open and sees the empty cans on the floor. Maybe he fell asleep. He still felt drunken, though not too terribly so.  
“Well, hey there, you hot fuckin’ mess.” Remus greets, walking over. He was covered in dry paint, a bit of a glint in his eye from the previous excitement Janus doesn’t know about yet.

“Well at least I’m still hot.” He replies with a smirk and Remus laughs.  
“Yeah! Gotta say your outfit really looks sexy.” He wiggles his eyebrows and Janus smiles, rolling his eyes.   
“I do try, believe it or not. I may be an emo nightmare, but at least I’m a hot nightmare.”   
“Fuck yeah!” Remus throws his hands up, and then slowly comes down from his high the longer he stares at his friend. Is he really that easy to read? Or did something happen? He sighs, cracking under his gaze.   
“I’m doing something stupid tomorrow.” He admits, not really going into detail.   
“And here I thought I was the one who did stupid shit.” Remus jokes, elbowing him a bit, but mostly keeping to himself. He’s gotten better at that. At least with Janus anyway, he still bugs other people to no end when they’re down.   
“Yeah, well, looks like we’re both idiots.” He sighs, laying back on the couch, looking up at Remus who’s now sat down beside his head. He stares at him, vision slightly fuzzy. Whether it was from just waking up or the alcohol or both, he wasn’t really sure. He sighs, closing his eyes and resting his head on Remus’s thigh.   
“Y’know if you turned your head around you’d be right in my dick.” He thinks aloud. There’s no sexual motivation behind those words, just a vulgar observation. He’s grown used to them, but he still huffs out a laugh.   
“Astute observation, Toad Prince.” He smirks. 

“I’m pretty good at those.” Remus agrees. He’s silent for a moment. “Is your stupid thing anything I should be super duper uber worried about?”

Janus thinks for a moment. “I don’t know, really. Don’t be too worried. You already have enough to worry about you dumb kind bastard.” Remus laughs loudly at that.  
“Nope! But if you come here looking beat up and have broken bones. Firstly, don’t actually come to me with broken bones. That could end poorly!” He says this cheerily. Janus hums a bit at his morbid humor. “But uhhhhhh…. Yeah I’ll not worry for now. That might change though! Who knows? I sure fucking don’t.”

Janus rolls his eyes fondly. Yeah, Remus was unpredictable even to himself. He’s toned down… like, alot since he first met him, but he’s still a loose cannon. He’s glad he has him as a friend, though. He’s a very… grey person, to be blunt. He can’t say that Remus is perfect, but he knows that Remus isn’t a monster. And sometimes all you need is for someone to remind you that you aren’t.  
Despite being his closest confidant, Remus doesn’t know that Janus himself needs to be told that. He can imagine a voice that very much is not Remus saying that to him. It was comforting and terrifying at the same time.

He gulps a bit, listening to whatever Remus says, only adding a few comments here and there. As it starts to get later, he feels himself more anxious. He’s both excited and terrified for tomorrow. Who knows, maybe it’s a huge misunderstanding and nothing will actually happen, but he has a sneaking suspicion. He sighs, closing his eyes tightly. Tomorrow will be stressful.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ahhh good old emotionally beating yourself up for a guy you like and have liked for years.  
> theyre both fucking morons. literally and figuratively :)  
> we got some funny lil nicknames thoug <3


	3. Spider Bites

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> had some trouble writing this one! sorry for the wait.

Today is going to be stressful.

He’s so fucked.

God, he has no idea what the fuck he was thinking. Virgil is really fucking in it now, huh? Why, oh why, the fuck, did he have to fucking grab Janus. Now he was just nervous and anxious and wondering if it’s too late to cancel. But shit, his thoughts were pestering him more than ever after yesterday. He really has no idea what to expect with Janus. He was initially just curious and acted on impulse which was so stupid, but he feels too nervous to call it off, and, really, he does want to try. As embarrassing and stupid as it is, he does want to try it with Janus.  
Maybe seeing the actual Janus in bed will stomp out the one in his fantasies and show him, ‘hey this is nothing like what I thought it was, we can stop having stupid fantasies now, right?’.   
Cause he’s only gotten subtle glimpses of Janus in that light, it’s not much to even go off of.

Still, he felt like it was a good way to knock that tall fucker down a peg. It was the fucking teasing from yesterday. Subtle enough that no one else would know what they were talking about. The pokes and prods to try and get a reaction out of him. But there was also the subtle way his fingers shook when he grabbed him, how he bit his lip and gave a shaky sigh. He’s not sure if it was nerves or… something else. Something was obviously up, but he really had no idea what. He wanted to do this, but he also didn’t want to force Janus into it.  
He wants to scream a bit. Maybe shake himself and like, uh, throw himself into a river or something. He’s, putting it simply, fucked. He’s so fucked. Why is he so worked up? Is it because it’s Janus? He doesn’t know. He needs to calm down. He thought working on another watch would help, he usually forgets everything when he does, but his hands were shaking. 

Groaning, he pushes away the magnifying glass, slumping back in his seat with a groan. The pocket watch he was working on now forgotten. He woke up early, and with his nerves coming back to him, he couldn’t get back to sleep. So he’s in the old garage no one uses. Well, no one except him and the rodents. It was dusty and a bit dirty and cluttered, so people really only came to store things, which didn’t happen often. He could see the dust floating in the air from the morning light.  
It was pretty, a little calming, but he was still tense with nerves. He can’t just not show up at his own dorm… And he doesn’t have the bastard’s number. He could talk to him in class, but after yesterday’s interaction, he just wants to disappear for a while. He groans, running a hand down his face. He’s so tired. It’s a bit late to go back to sleep, though.

Class is starting soon, and he looks like a wreck, but that’s nothing new, to be honest. He stands slowly, back aching and fingers sore. Isn’t he just a sexy beast? That’s sarcastic.

Going back to his dorm, people are already walking by him and coming out of their dorms. He sighs, entering his. It’s a bit of a mess, really. He shakes his head, throwing his hoodie on and grabbing his bag that was also starting to fall apart. He’s had it for ages and never cared enough to get a new one. Alot of his stuff falls apart because he doesn’t wanna spend money on new stuff. And he doesn’t really like going out.   
He checks to make sure he’s missed anything, he usually checks at least twice because he’s always scared he’ll forget something. Especially after leaving his dumb fucking toolbox. God. He shakes his head, combing his fingers through his hair and sighs. He had everything, and everything is where it usually is. He walks out the door, making sure to lock it behind him. 

So many different thoughts were swarming through his head. There’s just a lot to think about, and he can’t really process all of them. That was nothing new, but it was getting a bit overwhelming. He sighs, walking along the pavement. The sun was annoyingly bright for so early in the day. It was nice to go into the main building, even though there were alot of people. His patience for today was like a light switch, and everything felt like it was annoying him. He’s a fucking mess of a human being. He feels incredibly tense.

The class wasn’t full of students yet, at least. It was a big room to fit the students. Seats weren’t assigned, so people usually sit wherever. He always chooses a spot near the back, though. That wasn’t really surprising. But if he’d space off or fall asleep the professor would be less likely to notice. Its alot of students to keep count of, so he feels a bit bad for the guy, but also not that bad since he can be a dick.   
He gets his stuff out, opening his notes with a huff, deflating a bit. He just can’t really focus on his notebook either. Even though he’s the one that wrote everything down, his brain just refuses to process what he’s seeing. It was a pain, really. With all these thoughts plaguing his mind, it felt like a blur to him. Especially seeing the one who was plaguing his thoughts enter. He didn’t walk over this time, going to his own seat a few rows ahead. Just the way Janus moves is so… smooth? He’s not sure how to describe it. He always holds himself with a strange elegance. Like, a very fancy villain. Though he notices that the man isn’t quite as elaborately dressed, he also can’t get a good look at him. Either way it doesn’t really matter.   
He forces himself to look down. He was staring so hard yesterday, and he was just being creepy in general. God, he wants to slap himself. But he can’t help taking a few glances.   
Janus is attractive. He’s known that, but he never really thought it this much before. An attractive, tall, fucking bastard. Why is he so fucking tall? It’s not even that Virgil’s short, he’s 5’11”, but Janus is just so long. And he loves wearing those heeled boots, too. It was a bit annoying. Janus is annoyingly attractive.   
He then notices he’s staring again and quickly lowers his head. God, can he be normal for like 2 fucking seconds? Why doesn’t he think about the guy he actually likes? He’s never really thought of Logan in… a sexual way. He’s attractive, yes, and he likes him alot… That might be another reason he’s been freaking out so much. He doesn’t actually know. He doesn’t like questioning himself, and he fucking hates questioning his feelings. He’s had so many identity crises already, he doesn’t want to add another one to the mix. Are the feelings he has for Logan real? Is it just a phase? Why is Janus causing so much trouble for him? He just wants things to be simple.   
He groans, running his hands through his hair. Everything just feels wrong. He feels like he’s underwater right now. Or maybe a different timeline. None of this would’ve started if that damn snake didn’t get out. Or maybe he shouldn’t have barged into the room like that. Jesus, he never realized how impulsive he is until now. Alot of self questioning and realizations today, how fun.

Then suddenly the professor starts talking. He blinks, coming out of his daze. He’s still not completely here right now. He sighs, rubbing his tired eyes. He really should’ve gone back to sleep, huh? He’s not sure how he even slept in the first place. He might have to get some coffee after class. He doesn’t really like coffee much but it’ll wake him up at least. After his next class he’s not sure what he’s going to do during his study period. Sure, he’s behind in a few things but it’s not that bad, not enough that he needs to panic, and he could probably get it done in his classes anyway. He should probably eat, but he doesn’t have much of an appetite. He doesn’t know. He’ll figure it out later, probably. God, he’s thinking about too many things at once. He wishes he could just turn his brain off or something. If only it were that easy.  
He ends up sleeping through class.

The day felt like a blur. It went by too quickly and too slowly at the same time. He probably would’ve slept all day if it weren’t for a student nudging him when the lecture was over. He never got a coffee, and he didn’t have an appetite for lunch, unsurprisingly. Overall, not a great day he was having.  
He could feel himself getting tense as the end drew nearer. He’s done stuff like this before, but for some reason he’s so anxious about this. Is it cause it’s Janus? That might be it. Before that fateful night, he’s never thought this way… at all. He acknowledged the other was attractive, but that’s really it. Why is this all happening? He breathes out a long sigh, gripping tightly onto the straps of his bag. The walk to the dormitory building felt way too slow.   
His heart sounded too loud, and as he entered the building, he could see Janus already waiting at his door. And much to his dismay, the snake spots him immediately.   
“Ohh, hello, avicularia.” He greets, giving a wave. He huffs at the stupid nickname and slowly walks over.   
“Janus.” He says back, staring up at him. He looked nice, having done his makeup and outfit nicely, if a bit simple. His dumb yellow contact was missing, he noticed. A yellow jumper tucked into his black, slim tight jeans, and those dumb heeled boots. It was surprisingly simple for someone like Janus. “You’re not as elaborately dressed as you usually are.” He comments. Janus raises an eyebrow with a smirk.   
“No. I’m not. I figured it’d be too much of a trouble if I wore too much.” He says innocently, though they both know the implications of that. Virgil blushes a bit.   
“Y-Yeah… Okay.” He clears his throat, looking away.   
“Can I come in?” Janus asks, tilting his head a bit. Virgil opens his mouth to speak, but closes it, awkwardly rubbing his arm. Janus’s gaze softens a bit, he almost misses it. “We don’t have to do this, if you don’t want to, Virgil.”   
“N-No, no. It’s okay. Come in.” He walks past the taller, unlocking his door and opening it, gesturing for him to come inside. Janus stares at him, eyebrows furrowed.   
“Are you sure?” He asks again, tilting his head. Why does he have to be concerned right now? He didn’t want any emotions involved in this, and Janus acting like this was not helping his already confused brain. He sighs.   
“Yeah, I’m sure, now come in.” He leads the both of them inside before he can convince himself not to.   
  


Janus looks around as he walks in, analyzing the room carefully in a way that made Virgil nervous. Janus then smiles, stretching his arms out over his head and walking over to sit down on his bed. He hums, looking back at Virgil.  
“So.” He hums, leaning forward and resting his head in his hand. “Should we discuss first? Or just jump into it?” Virgil stammers, shifting awkwardly.   
“Ah, uh… We can… talk first, yeah.” He shuffles, hesitating a second before sitting down on the bed as well, a reasonable distance between the two. Janus hums and nods, staring.   
“Okay. Is there anything specific you’re wanting, paramour?” He asks, smirking a little. Paramour. Virgil shifts a bit at that word, rubbing his neck nervously.   
“Have you… Have you done this before?” He asks, eyes flicking up to Janus and then away.   
“Oh, yeah.” Janus smiles. “About a year after you left…” Virgil looks away at that, “Roman and I started to hook up.”   
He bites his lip, trying to ignore that bit of jealousy in him. He’s not sure why he’s even jealous to begin with. God, keep it together, idiot. “Roman? Really?”   
“Yeah. He came to me.” He hums, starting to unlace his boots. “We don’t see eachother often, now. Usually it’s just random people.”   
“Ah.. I see…” He nods. “Just.. out of curiosity, have you ever been with a woman...?”  
Janus huffs out a laugh. “Wow, digging into my private life like that. I’m joking, I don’t really care.” He pauses though, looking up. “Yeah, only twice, though. One of them pegged me.”  
Janus says this so casually that Virgil almost chokes a little, face blushing. Janus chuckles his usual mischievous way, making him more embarrassed. He hums, setting his boots to the side and turning to face Virgil, one leg crossed over the other.   
“You’re so funny, my paramour.” He smiles, tilting his head slightly, curly hair falling into his face. “Anyways, what do you want? Anything you’re into? I’m up for most things.”   
“S-Slow down! Fucking hell.” He stutters, shifting back a little. “I mean… What are you into?” He asks, reversing the question. He felt a bit embarrassed and stupid but Janus hums, looking up.   
“Well… I don’t really like putting labels, but I guess I’m a switch, first of all. I like ropes, teasing, a bit of pain…” He leans back, smirking. “Though I don’t like to be a completely submissive puppet. I don’t like.. Obeying. You can have fun with that however you like.”   
Virgil knows he probably looks stupid right now. He can feel his arousal, and he clears his throat, averting his eyes.   
“Okay… okay.” He feels nervous. He’s done this before, though, why is he nervous? He shakes his head, wetting his lips.   
“You can at least help me set the mood, Virge.” He smiles, leaning forward. “Haven’t you done this before?”   
“Of course I have!” He snaps back. He sounds like some teenager trying to convince his friends he had sex. God he’s pathetic. Janus raises an eyebrow. God, he’s trying to get him upset. He’s not sure why.   
“Hmm, I dunno, hun… You’re a bit nervous, aren’t you?” He teases. “Don’t be shy, blackbird”  
“I’m… I’m not..!” He huffs, glaring.  
“Well if you’re so confident, prove it to me.”   
Ah, so that’s the game he’s playing here, hm? He narrows his eyes. Alright, he’ll show him.   
  
He pushes Janus down, maybe a bit harder than he had intended, climbing over him. The other man blinks, staring up at him and humming.   
“There’s that fight in you. You don’t have to hold it back.” He reaches his arms up, wrapping them around his neck and pulling him down roughly. Virgil swallows, looking at the man underneath him. He really was attractive. He has the desire to just… kiss him. But he ignores that, pushing it back and leaning down to his neck. He hears Janus give a sigh, gripping a bit tighter as he bites down gently. He can feel the body under him shudder.   
“Don’t… draw blood this time.” He says, much quieter than before. He’s warm. It’s been a while since he’s slept with anyone. He closes his eyes, pulling at the skin between his teeth so he could at least leave a mark. Janus bites his lip. He nips at the area, going closer to the jaw, but he’s still not getting the reaction he wants. Janus is flinching and sighing, but nothing too exciting. He moves a bit lower, tugging at his jumper to get more room, and bites down right above his collarbone. He yelps, flinching underneath him. That’s better. Or he thought it was better.   
  


But before he can do anything more, he’s suddenly flipped over, Janus over him instead, glaring down at him. He holds him down by the shoulders.  
“Let’s make one thing clear.” He leans in. “Don’t try any of this.” He gestures to his scars. To be honest, he hardly realized he was biting at his scar. “You can touch, but don’t do anything else. Do I make myself clear?”   
Virgil gulps. “Y-Yeah, sorry.” Janus relaxes, gaze softening. Something about the way his gaze just… softened made his heart pound a bit quicker, and he’s not sure why. The taller mutters something to himself and he loosens his grip. He stares down at him, a quiet moment shared between the two. It was almost starting to feel… Too much. Janus then starts speaking again.   
“Y’know, I said yesterday that I don’t bite…” He starts, getting right back to it. His hand gently strokes his cheek, to his jaw, and slowly down his neck. He shivers, biting his lip. “But if you want me to I can.”

“Ah, uh..” He stammers, averting his gaze from the other.  
“I need verbal consent, Virgil.” He says, gently brushing hair out of his face.   
“O-Okay. Yeah.” He nods and Janus smiles. He’s… a lot different than Virgil had imagined. But not in a bad way, and that scares him a little. But at the moment he’s too distracted to open that can of worms. The other hums, wetting his lips and leaning in.   
“Hope you’ve got something to cover your neck.” He teases, fingers gently combing through his hair. He bites down without much warning, and Virgil can’t help the noise he makes. He can feel him smirking against his neck. Smug bastard. “Don’t be too loud, you’ve got neighbors.”   
God, now he’s just gonna annoy him now that he’s got him pinned down. He was about to say something when he’s once again bitten. He groans. Janus hums, one hand traveling to his chest, the other staying in his hair. Yeah, he’s… definitely done this before, huh? He goes to the area between his neck and shoulder, biting down just like Virgil had the other day ago. Virgil flinches, biting his lip to muffle any sound.   
“Y’know,” Janus starts, and he’s already annoyed, “If we weren’t in the dorms, I’d like to hear you louder. Shame.”   
“Going on about noise and then you’re running your mouth.” Virgil grumbles. Janus laughs against his neck.   
“Shut me up, then.” He lifts his head back up.   
“You want me to be harsher?”   
“Why else would I be egging you on? I said you don’t have to hold back, but you’ve been so docile.” He pouts. “I knew you were a softy, but after our fight, I expected more.”   
“And right now you’re trying to rile me up?” He asks, eyebrows furrowing.   
“Yep! Is it working, blackbird?” He tilts his head.   
“A little, yeah.” He huffs.   
“Then shut me up, little spider.”   
Well, it is working. It’s not a hard job for Janus to get him annoyed. He wants him to shut him up? Okay.

He sits up, glaring at Janus and his stupid pretty smirk. He raises an eyebrow. Virgil grabs him by the front of the shirt, and smashes their lips together. Their teeth clack together, and he can hear Janus let out a muffled yelp. It was an intense kiss, not at all soft or loving. They weren’t working together at all with this kiss, both trying to struggle for control. Virgil growls, biting the other’s lip and tugging. Janus hisses, gripping onto his hair tightly.  
He slips his tongue in, deepening this further. At least it was passionate. Though, he’s a bit surprised when he feels a piercing on the other’s tongue. He’s not sure how he never noticed before. He groans, pulling away and pushing Janus down a bit harshly. They both pause, trying to catch their breath after that. The taller lifts his hand up to his lips, swiping some saliva away. His lips were slightly bruised, and he’s sure his were as well. He huffs, tugging at the other’s jumper. He looks at him to make sure this is okay. Janus groans.   
“Just fucking get on with it.” He sighs. Maybe he should’ve taped his mouth shut. Virgil rolls his eyes, pulling the other’s jumper off and putting it aside.   
And. Well, he keeps being reminded and shown that Janus is really attractive. Slim, soft skin. Not at all like his own. He bites his lip, a hand gliding down his torso, just feeling him. He shivers under his touch. To his surprise, he can feel muscle under his fingers.   
“Do you work out?” He asks, raising an eyebrow.   
“Try picking up a burmese python by yourself.” He rolls his eyes. “I’ve practiced in some self-defense classes, but I don’t really do much outside of that.”   
He hums, nodding slowly. He glides his fingers down his sides, faintly feeling his ribs. His previous annoyance was now forgotten as he admires the body below him. He’s never really appreciated someone’s body like this before. Even with the scars continuing down to his shoulder and arm, he just… Wanted to feel him.   
“You’re really… pretty.” He says, not really thinking about it, caressing his side gently. When he gets no witty comeback, he looks up, seeing Janus turning his head away with a blush. He blinks a few times, wondering if he’s seeing this wrong. But, no, this was real. “Wow. If I’d known earlier it was this easy to get you shy, I would’ve said so earlier.”   
“Shut up.” He mutters, moving his hands to cover his face. Virgil smiles, amused, and grabs his hands away.   
“I’m not lying, though. You’re pretty attractive.” He continues. Janus groans, averting his eyes.   
“Are you just going to do this now? Is this payback or something? I came here cause you wanted to hookup, stop actually giving me compliments.” He complains, closing his eyes tightly.   
“Oh, but I like how the tables have turned for once.” He teases, leaning in. “Plus, it’s cute when you blush…. For you, anyway.” He says, adding in that last part when he realizes just how sappy he’s been. It was getting way too intimate for his liking. This is just a hookup. Stop doing this, Virgil.   
“Oh, wow, thanks.” He says, tone dropping into something more… apathetic. “Can we continue now?”   
Virgil is quiet for a moment, having to take a second to process his words and the sudden shift in tone. Maybe he was a little hard. But, he rolls his eyes and complies, leaning down to bite his chest.   
“Ah-” He cuts himself off, biting his lip and shuddering. He closes his eyes.

This continued for a few more bites. They were both hard by now. And they were both feeling a little impatient. Well, that’s what he assumed because of Janus’s words.  
“Y’know, I’m starting to feel a bit underdressed there.” He comments and Virgil sighs, throwing off his jacket and shirt. At least he was feeling more confident. Janus stares, and for the first time tonight, he isn’t showing anything on his face. It’s not that he looks bored, either… Just... Not entirely there. Virgil pauses his actions, tilting his head a little.

“Are you.. Okay?” He asks, raising an eyebrow. Janus blinks a few times, looking at his chest and then his face.  
“Oh. Yeah, yeah.. Sorry.” He smiles, sitting up. “Sorry, you’re just quite the vision, I just couldn’t help myself.”   
His usual energy wasn’t in his voice. Virgil wasn’t really buying it, but he tries to not press further. It was… alot. He has no reason to pry, either, but a slither of concern wormed its way into him.   
“Should we…” He trails off, looking back at the snake. Said snake was looking over at the wall. Bruises were starting to form on his neck and chest. He would’ve appreciated them more if it weren’t for the sudden shift in the mood. It seems Janus just now takes in his words, and he stiffens up. “We don’t have to continue, Janus.”   
Janus looks over. His eyeliner is slightly smudged.   
“I..” He starts, trailing off. He lets out a heavy sigh, shoulders dropping. “Sorry, Virgil.”   
They’re both quiet for a moment. It was a bit of a bummer, sure, but even though he doesn’t like Janus, he wants to consider his feelings.   
“I think I should go.” He says, voice very quiet. Virgil frowns, tilting his head.   
“I mean I won’t stop you, but if I did something wrong I’d rather you tell me.” He says, handing the man his jumper, which he takes slowly.   
“You didn’t do anything wrong.” He says simply, avoiding any kind of eye contact. It all.. Felt really sudden. “I had fun.”

Janus puts his jumper back on, some bruises still noticeable on his neck. The tension in the air was incredibly thick. Virgil suddenly feels cold, anxiety rising in him as he also gets dressed. He swallows as the taller ties his boots.  
“I’ll.. pay you back some time, okay?” Janus hums, standing and staring for a moment, before going to the door.   
“Janus…?” He tilts his head a little. The taller one gives a little smile, opening his mouth to speak, and then closing it, thinking over his words before he sighs, shaking his head.   
“I… See you later, Virgil.” He says softly, glancing back at him once more before leaving.

Virgil is left in his room alone. He still had an... issue, but at the moment his head was more preoccupied with his newfound concern for the taller man. He doesn’t know what happened, really. But he feels guilty for some reason. Did he do something wrong and Janus just didn’t want to say it? He gulps, anxiety crawling up under his skin like bugs. He shivers. His arousal has died down now, leaving him feeling confused and concerned.  
He stands up slowly. He needs to do something with his hands. Or just do anything. His back felt heavy with these new sudden worries. He gives a shaky sigh, opening his drawer and grabbing a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He tries to not do this, he knows that people will be upset and disappointed with him, but he needs some relief. He shoves the items into his pockets and leaves to go to the garage.

It was always cold in the garage at night. He takes a seat at his desk, his discarded pocket watch from this morning still there. He takes out the pack and lighter, grabbing a cigarette and holding it between his lips, using the lighter. It was a bit of relief, but he knows in reality it’ll make him feel worse later. He pushes that aside for now, picking up his tools. But he doesn’t move, simply staring at the unfinished watch. It’s not that he didn’t know what to do, it was that he just… couldn’t. There was no motivation to get this done. It was a strange sensation. He blinks slowly, sighing and blowing out some smoke, closing his eyes. He drops his things, leaning against the desk.  
He doesn’t know what went wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Virgil and Janus are not in sync. i feel like with alot of fanfiction the characters will be in sync always, and not much goes wrong at all. And there's nothing wrong with that type of fanfiction! I just wanted to highlight that this journey is not going to be easy for either of them.


End file.
